Poodle - unexpected death

Question
Friday morning my six year old poodle named Baby collapsed in front of me and unfortunately fell down a flight of carpeted stairs.  She died and it has crushed me because I don't know why.  She had been to the Vet so many times for a cough and they ran tests but could not tell us what was wrong with her.  She was put on three types of medicine which concerned me from the beginning because she was only five pounds, she was so tiny and absolutely adorable.  I still have her mother and everyday I am suffering more and more with what might have happened to her.  We did not have an autopsy, my husband and I were just too crushed at the time.  After some discussions with the Vet and friends, everyone seems to think she had a heart attack and was gone before she fell down the stairs.  Can you help me because I am so crushed that I can't work, eat, sleep or stop crying.  I am concerned about the mother, I blame myself because I feel that I should have done more or maybe we gave her more medicine than her little body could handle.  This is just killing me so I am reaching out for any kind of help that I can get.

Answer
JoAnn,

Honey, there was nothing you could do.  I know it is easy to say and hard to absorb, but you just can't forsee everything, and I'd guess she had a heart attack too. I can, however, offer you a bit of comfort (I hope).  There is a website I found when I lost my first companion Nicky and thought I would not survive.  It is at:

http://www.petloss.com

There is a lovely poem called Rainbow Bridge, and beautiful tributes to our lost loved ones.  We have a candle lighting ceremony every Monday evening in remembrance of those who have gone before us.  I'm not sure if the ceremony of it lends comfort or the beauty of the poem Rainbow Bridge wrings healing tears - but it helped me and I hope it will help you.

If you need to talk, please e-mail me at my main e-mail address (kathrynks@cox.net) - we can chat via e-mail or if you'd want to leave me your phone number I'd be happy to call you. If that makes you nervous, I'll send you my number - either way I'm happy to talk and help if I can.

I'm going to put the poem Rainbow Bridge below, because if you're like me, you'll put off visiting the site for a bit, and this is just too beautiful for that.  I wish you healing tears and comfort.

Kathryn

RAINBOW BRIDGE

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...