Moody filly

Question
QUESTION: Hello,
I have a filly that is almost 2 years old. Sometimes when I work with the other horses in the pasture she is fine, but other times she will try to bite and kick me. She is well trained, and I own her and train her. My dad says he will make me sell her if she doesn't smarten up soon. What can I do to change her attitude? She is a very loving QH/Paint filly. Thanks,
Bianca

ANSWER: Hi Bianca!

Reality check here...I'm going to give this to you straight and not sugar coat if for you...your horse is NOT dumb and she is NOT trained.  A well educated, respectful horse will not kick and bite at you.  Why would you allow this?

If you are out in the pasture, take your rope halter or your flag.  If your filly approaches you in a disrespectful way, send her off.  You do not have to allow this behavior.  What would happen to you if you walked up to your Dad and kicked him in the knee?  I'm pretty sure you would only do that once!  You filly does not view you as a leader!  You are a lower level herdmate that she can and does push around.  The key to changing HER attitude is to change YOUR attitude!  You have to be the leader, teacher and boss mare of your little herd.  You have to teach her how to respect you with out hurting her or scaring her.  She may get a little scared when you tell her to leave and you send her off, but you are NOT trying to scare her.  Your attitude is one that demands respect and you will not tolerate her lack of respect any more.  

So, when she approaches and she is respectful and kind, rub her and groom her, make it feel good to her, let her know you are a good deal.  However, if she approaches and she is pushing on you or turning her hind quarters to kick at you drive her off and mean it.  If you have to "nip" her with your lead rope do it.  Make it clear that her behavior will NOT be tolerated. Be looking for her to look you up and when she is respectful, again, get soft and comfortable.  continue this pattern until she knows what is expected of her.  I want you to go back and read my past answers on "hooking on".  This is what you are doing.  Also, watch the "Ground Work" DVD by Buck Brannaman.  You will see a lot of what you are missing in your horsemanship education.

Give me a shout and let me know how things are going.  You can make the changes you are looking for, it starts with YOU!

Smiles, Denise

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Ok. I have worked on her with those things, but now she doesnt come and bite or kick me. My dad brings the horses water with the tractor and while he pets the other horses, she butts her head in. If she doesnt get the attention, she sometimes gets moody. How can I change that? She also flies in and out of moods, she can be happy one minute and angry the next. How can I change that?
Thanks,
Bianca

Answer
Hi Bianca!

It is pretty simple, you make the right thing easy and the wrong thing difficult.  You also have to have a greater understanding of the horse.  Horses are honest.  Your filly is only doing what she thinks she needs to do to survive.  Horses to not think and act like the human, so you have to think of horses in HORSE terms.  She is not moody, she is just doing what she thinks she needs to do to get along in the world and you as her leader have to show her where her limits and boundaries are and what she needs to be doing.  It is the same for your Dad.

If you are going to be around horses, you have to understand them.  If you don't you will run into the horse that will test your knowledge and wisdom when it comes to horsemanship.  This filly is less forgiving than your other horses of human mistakes and shortcomings.  She is just more horse.  There is more going on in her mind.  She sees the lack of understanding and leadership as a weakness and is coming up with a plan of her own.  This filly is a survivor.  She is learning how to take care of herself and be a natural leader.  The rest of your horses just get along.  THEY fill in for YOU and your Dad.

You have to offer this filly more direction and support.  She is not some dull old mare that will just accept anything from you.  You have to learn more and be more to get along.  I don't think you and your Dad have watched Buck's DVD yet.  Do it.  It will help you understand this filly and help you show her how to be a good citizen.  It will show you how to be more of a leader in HORSE terms.  

You are looking for an easy answer and there is none.  You have to learn and put the effort into being more of a horseman.  I am telling you very clearly, watch the DVD.  It is 2 hours long and I can't duplicate that information here.  There is no magic button you can push with a horse and have everything come out perfect.  You, Bianca, have to go to school for 12 years and then to college before you are ready for the working world, yet you expect your filly to understand how to be a wonderful equine partner all on her own.  Can you lead her by her front feet and stop her on a hind foot, can she pack a lass rope on her belly and flanks, can you flag her and will she stay calm and confident, can you disengage her hind quarters and get her fronts to come through, can she back soft and supple with her nose down and in, can you back an accurate circle with the outside foot reaching out and back, can YOU count cadence and do you know when each foot is leaving and striking the ground, can you lead her by on the fence and expose her to the flag from there, is she your partner when haltering and will she offer to put her head in the halter, can you saddle her and have her be part of the process, will she softly move forward/back/left and right, full pass, leg yield...and THIS is only ground work.  

When your horse is able to do all of these things and more, again watch the DVD and attend a colt starting clinic, THEN what you are calling "moody" behavior will be gone.  You can't just point your finger at her and say "stop that", you have to teach her and the only way you can teach HER is to educate yourself.  I am pointing you in the correct direction, I am offering YOU direction and support, I have given you some very important things to do and it is up to you and your Dad to follow through.  You are not a student in my barn, so I am not there every day to help you.  I have to figure out a way to get you the information you need long distance and you need a whole LOT of information...Watch the DVD and read Buck's little ground work book.  As a matter of fact, I keep a copy of the book in my barn and when I was just learning this, I kept it tucked into the round pen so I could drag it out and look at it again and again.  

Bianca, when you are different and when you have learned how to be a leader, your filly will be different.  It requires that you do what I have asked you to do.  The DVD is 2 hours long, you and your Dad can watch it together...today.  If you do you can start changing things tomorrow and forever.

Horses know when you know and they know when you don't know.  If you make the right thing easy...allowing your filly to be close to you when she is respectful, calm and submissive...and the wrong thing difficult... you send your filly away by using your flag or lead rope when she is aggressive, "angry" and disrespectful...THIS is the beginning of changing who she is when she is around you, BUT you have to learn more or she will just become dull and disrespectful to the flag and the lead rope because YOU have not learned about feel, timing and balance.

So, I have given you what you need to get going, now the responsibility is yours...make your Dad part of the process too.  This will be great for both of you!  Give me a shout and let me know how things are going.  This FILLY is going to make you a hand and more of a horsewoman than all of your other horses put together...thank her!

Smiles, Denise

Good for you Bianca!!!

I know you and your filly will make it and have a wonderful partnership.  You just have a little more learning to do and a bit of a hill to climb.  Make sure you have your Dad become part of the process.  You need his partnership as well.

Keep me posted.  I know you will be great!

Smiles, Denise