new big dog and old little one

Question
I bought a golden retriever in June when he was just six weeks and when I brought him home my other dog which is a Maltese mix. The golden retriever is a boy and the Maltese is a girl, I was told to get different genders. so far shes hated his guts always trying to snap at him when he gets near and its hard for me to get him used to the house with her always around attacking him. When i want to bring him in from the porch to stay in the house I have to put my Maltese in another room and close the door otherwise she attacks him. Now he does go after her also, but not in the same way she does. He goes up to her like a puppy would trying to play, always wagging his tail like hes happy, but she just hates him so much. She is also very protective which is also a problem because she'll attack him when we go near him. So any help with me trying to get them in the house together would be greatly appreciated.

Answer
Hi Mike;
I take females and males all the time. I have never found a difference.
Right now, I have 4 male dogs, of my own, and my friend has to go to a care facility so her little male Yorkie has come to live with us.
He has been here often, and gets along great with my other dogs, but every time he comes for a visit, and there is a new dog, I have the sa,e problem with him.
I have had all males before, and all females, and them mixed genders.
It is ALL in thr training and the fact that I am the alpha, and there is NO room for another one, and they either go by the rules or spend their time in time-out, after a good butt chewing.
I just answered this same type of proble for a girl.
I am going to copy my answer to her here.
You just have to establish who is boss in the house, and stand for NO silliness.
I don'y know why such little ones pick on dogs that are many times their own size.
Mighty Mite is learning the hard way, but he gets better every day about it.LOl
This is a long story, but it does give a bit of an example about how to handle these lttle dictators.
It is just a coincidence that the dogs in these cass are all male. I have had to deal with the same problem with mixed genders too.
When it is between neutered males or spoayed females, it is a matter of "not going to allow mom and dad to have any other kids but me?.
Charlotte
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Subject:  chiwawa mix attacks my shepard/heeler mix
Question:  We have had Sunny (4 year old chiwawa mix) since his birth.  Then rescued two other dogs when they were 3 monts old (both are now around 10-11 months - large breeds) I don't know why, but Sunny always attacks my other dog Dymamite.  Sunny has already established his alpha position between the three.  Dynamite is very docile and sweet, we don't understand why Sunny is doing this. Sunny is obedient with us, it happends when we aren't around, we find out when the dog is screaming and sometimes bleeding.  Sunny seems to know he's doing wrong when we come out to see what's happening.   What should we do?!
 
Answer:  Hi Melissa;
This is not unusual at all.
Sunny is establishing his place as the alpha and possibly intends to make the other dog leave, because he doesn't want to share his home and mommy and daddy.
I am going through this right now with a little Yorkie;
My friend can no longer care for her dog as she is living in a nursing home, so he came to me.
He is 8 years old, and has been here for a couple times a year for a visit.
She usually comes for a couple of weeks, so he considers this his scond home.
He and my Lhasa mix are 2 months apart, and have been best friends since they were puppies.
My Australian Shepherd mix was 1 year old when my son brought the Lhasa to us, and Rowdy ( the Aussie) took him over like he was the puppy's mother.
When we had this little brat for a couplke of weeks, I heard all #%#$^ break loose, and ran to the living room to see that puppy clinging to Rowdy;s face, with his body shaking, suspended in the air, and seemingly trying to kill that big dog.
Rowdy looked at me like, "Do you believe this?"
I plucked the little terror off Rowdy's face an scolded him and put him in time out.
Rowdy took up for him, so it had to be done often.
They are 8 and 9 now,and every once in a while, Max ( the brat) growls and makes an attempt at going at Rowdy again, but, Asking him in a stern voice if he wants to go to time out, makes him calm down and act like a gentleman.
Mighty /mite, the Yiorkie did this when he and Barb came after we got our year and a half old Sheltie.
He was not going to stand for another dog being here, so he would attack Laddie, viciously. When he brought blood, Aunt Charlotte took the matter in hand and grabbed him up and chewed him out good and put his little butt in time out.
Barb was not a strict disciplinarian, and she just no,noed him.
He learned to act nicely with Laddie after about the third time in time out, and has been nice since.
Now, when he came, there is another Australian Shepherd mix here, and I knew there was going to be a repeat of the same behavior.
Yep, there was.
He has been to time out about 4 times this week, and tomotrrow I am calling our Vet and making an appointment to have him neutered.
That will help a lot, but he will still need some watching.
I don't tollerate fighting, and he has to learn that.
Nobody is chasing anybody off, and I am not going to stand for another dog being abused, just because he is even tempered and won't turn around and eat the little monster.
The Australian Shephers and the HGealers etc are very well tempered dogs, and they don't fight to hurt, only to defend themselves.
That was a long story, but my reason for telling it is to show that a lot of dogs behave this way.
Big Boy, the Aussie mix weighs about 55 pounds, and Mighty Mite weighs 9 and a half pounds.
Now THAT is what you call deluisions of grandeur!
Mighty Mite has to learn what all the other dogs know.
I am a good mom, an they will get spoiled rotten and pampered, and have a nice loving, safe home, but I am the alpha, nobody else, and if you don't mind mom, you can live in time out as much as you want.
Make it easy on yourself.
Spanking dosn't do as much good as it does with human children, and it is very innefective with them, so it will only make the situation worse with dogs.
Mine HATE time out with a purple passion, and will straighten up to get oput of it.
Beore Mite attaches himself to Big Boy, if I catch it and rally yll at him and start toward him, he will stop and behave, but I have to watch him, or when I turn my back, he will finish the job.
Big Boy tries to grab him and get him off of him, but there is just so much even the sweetest dog will take before he kills the little fool, and I sure don't want either of them hurt.
I am thinking since he will have one of those plastic collars when he is neutered, I will keep it, and if she keeps attacking Big Boy, I will put that on him when they are in the yard.
Use the collar and another time out place.LOL
Time out is 30 minutes closed up in the small bathroom, after they get their butt chewed out royally and all the way to time out.
The secoind offense gets a longer time out and so on.
I find the time out to be the best tool I have ever used to change unpleasand behavior.
Has Sunny ben neutered?
If the other doh neutered?
If Neither have been neutered, that could be the reason for a lot of this.
Dynamite has come into manhood, and is a threat to Sunny's territory with the chicks.
Having them neutered if they are not already will help , and also help proglong a healthy life, and time out, and chewing out like you may eat him if he doesn't behave.
They don't like nagging, and I can nag real good.
You just have to teach him that no matter how determined he is to dominate, it is not in his best interest to stir mom up.

Charlotte