Adopted dog too dominant!

Question
Hi

I have a three year old Golden Retriever (Toby) that I have raised since he was about ten weeks old. He was an "only child" until two days ago, when we brought home a five year old liver Labrador retriever (Bear). I took Toby to meet Bear the same day I brought Bear home, and they both seemed playful and it seemed like they were going to get along great. Bear has been house trained, knows his basic commands, is good with kids, and knows how to play catch without jumping on me and will bring the ball back and drop it on the floor. Toby knows his basic commands, is improving in being house trained, and doesn't really want to bring back the ball when we play catch. And often jumps on us, our guests, and our young relatives (kids) with is no good. We adopted Bear because we felt that he was a really sweet and well mannered dog who needed a home. Plus, we knew our dog needed a companion because we cant take him to the dog park that often. We also thought that getting a mature older dog would help this somewhat crazy Golden "grow up."

Anyways, when we brought Bear home, Toby tried to bite him in the ear. Not aggressively, but as they walked. I scolded (NO! LEAVE IT!) and Toby stopped. I started to play catch with them and Toby became too possessive, provoking Bear to follow HIM around since Toby had the ball. When Bear noticed another ball in the floor, he picked it up, ignored Toby, and brought it to me. Toby noticed this and dropped his ball and came to me also. Bear didnt seem to care about Toby being possessive over toys. When it came to feeding time, I brought two bowls of food and put them a good 10 ft. apart. Toby didnt mind eating at the same time as Bear, but Bear did. At first he growled at Toby, showing his teeth, and then just "attacked" him for about 2 seconds and then stopped after I yelled. My sister says at night time, the two had an altercation for a few seconds and then it ended.

The next morning, it seemed ok. Both of them were walking together. We played catch again and Toby started to growl at Bear when Toby had the ball in his mouth and Bear got near. Of course, I yelled at Toby, and Toby stopped. Feeding time came around and this time I placed the food bowls in different corners of the house. They both ate good, then Toby checked on Bear, who growled at him, so Toby went back to his bowl. Bear checked Toby, saw him eating, and "attacked" him again, this time, the altercation lasting for about 10 seconds! They wouldnt listen to me until I used the  broom to break it up. They continued the day as if nothing happened. Toby tried dominating Bear a few times (humping) but Bear growled and did a small lashback for less than a second. At night time, they were both trying to dominate each other (both neutered) and no altercations but some barking. I broke it up and this time, no fight later on.

Today, I fed Bear in his kennel and Toby at a corner of the house. I let them go and forgot to pick up Toby's bowl. As they walk around, Toby gets a bite from his bowl, Bear notices, and they have an altercation for about a second. Also while playing catch, since Toby is possessive, Bear is trying to get the ball out of Tobys mouth. Not violently, but trying to knock it out of his mouth with his nose. Toby growled slightly at Bear.

My parents want be to "return" Bear. I want to work it out. I was told this was natural with new dogs. Any suggestions on what I can do to stop this "fighting" ?

Thank You.

Answer
There are cases where 2 dogs of the same sex never do settle down and even the most experienced one must rehome one of them.  You would have down much better to have gotten a female as the second dog.  You can try teaching Bear that you are in charge.  The key to most behavior problems is approaching things using the dog's natural instincts. Dogs see all the people and dogs in the household as a pack with each having their own rank in the pack and a top dog. Life is much easier if the 2 legged pack members outrank the 4 legged ones. You can learn to play the role of top dog by reading some books or going to a good obedience class. A good obedience class or book is about you being top dog, not about rewarding standard commands with a treat. Start at http://www.dogsbestfriend.com/ For more on being top dog, see http://www.dogbreedinfo.com./topdogrules.htm

It sounds like part of time they are just playing.  The chase where one dog runs with a toy and the other chases it is very common.  The aggression with the food dish is a problem.  Kennel Bear, and feed Toby.  After Toby is finished, then feed Bear.