Whining and crying dog..Help!

Question
"Sam is a 6 yr old adopted male ESS and I have had him for about 4 months. It was love and connect at first site and he only wants to be with me...follows my every move and stays in my bedroom all day when I am gone. He has difficulty with other family members by cowering, crying  and running back to me. When I started to take him in the car, he loved it, but started to cry and whine. I thought he had to go Pee Pee, so I would find a spot to pull the car over and let him out.  Well, he not only pee pee but pooh as well.  As time has gone bye, everytime we get into the car and start to travel, he starts crying and whining...and the same situation...he pee pee and pooh's.  He does not stop! He will continue to cry and whine every time I slow down or stop at a light or go to the store even though I have already stop and let him go again and again.  I have "NO CRY" firmly, and even yelled at him in anger....sorry...but it is driving me crazy and I am afraid he is saving he bathroom for the car ride.  I take him out to pee and pooh all the time at home and especially before a car ride.  He usually pee's, but the whole situation begins again in the car.

Also, he is almost fearful of having me out of his site.  Constantly under my feet and I have try distractions, assurance, firm commands and nothing works.  He also barks everytime someone comes near me if we have been alone and they approach, then cry and whining with a happy wiggly tail.

Helllllllpppppp!  I love him dearly, but I don't know what to do.  If I ignore him in the car, I will either have a car accident from the stress or I am afraid he will pee or pooh in the car if I don't stop.

Only myself and my older daughter live together, and when people come over he is OK, but he is glued to me.

What can I do to stop this whining and crying and stressful situation with him?"


Answer
The problem with the car may be stress.  Dogs will eliminate when stressed.  With my one lab puppy I never dared encounter a train without  clean up material with me.  Perhaps some of the confidence building techniques  suggest for submissive wetting will help. More self confidence will help the other problems too.  

Start with obedience training. The key to most behavior problems is approaching things using the dog's natural instincts. Dogs see all the people and dogs in the household as a pack with each having their own rank in the pack and a top dog. Life is much easier if the 2 legged pack members outrank the 4 legged ones. You can learn to play the role of top dog by reading some books or going to a good obedience class. A good obedience class or book is about you being top dog, not about rewarding standard commands with a treat. Start at http://www.dogsbestfriend.com/ As you praise the dog for following your commands, it will build its confidence.

Play tug of war with the dog and lose. However at the end of the game, take the rope or toy and put it up, less the dog becomes confused about who is top dog. Ropes from the pets' store quickly turn to hazardous shreds. Ones I made lasted much better. Go to a hardware or home center that sells rope by the foot. Buy 2' of 3/4" poly rope. Melt the ends, and tie knots in it. Get them as tight as possible, put it in a vise and pound it with a hammer. Watch carefully, and be ready to discard when it comes apart.

Finally, make sure it has a den to live in. If you are not using a crate, buy one. The dog may be happier in its den than loose in the house. It relaxes, it feels safe in its den. It rests, the body slows down reducing the need for water and relieving its self. Dogs that have been crated all along do very well. Many of them will rest in their crates even when the door is open. I think the plastic ones give the dog more of a safe, enclosed den feeling. Metal ones can be put in a corner or covered with something the dog can't pull in and chew. Select a crate just big enough for the full grown dog to stretch out in.

A dog that has not been crated since it was little, may take some work. Start out just putting its toys and treats in the crate. Praise it for going in. Feed it in the crate. This is also an easy way to maintain order at feeding time for more than one dog.