bunnies afraid of us

Question
Hi!  I have a bit of a problem.  My fiance and I bought two neutered male
bunnies (about 6 months old, the pet store said, but they really didn't know)
around 5 months ago.  The pet store said they hadn't been handled much so
they would be skittish, but that they usually snapped out of it w/in a few
days.  Well.... we did lots of research online and when they were in the cage,
we sat near them and talked to them and gradually moved closer and let them
smell us.  We let them run around outside the cage and gave them small bits
of healthy treats like apples, lettuce, and cranberries.  We talked to them,
sang to them, sat around silently and just hung out.... but they STILL won't let
us touch them.....

Some more background- I have a cat who HATES other small animals.  We
had the bunnies in the front room for about 3 days and she wouldn't even go
past their cage.  This was bad because the cage was right between our
bedroom and the room with her food and litter box.  So, either she wouldn't
come cuddle at night, or she wouldn't go eat/use the litter box.  The tension
in the house was killing me, so we moved them to the back guest room which
is a lot quieter, so probably better for them anyway. Now, because they were
put in the back guest room, we don't spend as much time with them as we
probably should, but for the first 3-4 months, we went in at least twice a day
and the second time (before bed), we would let them out of the cage and we
would stay in for at least an hour, even if we just sat around and watched tv
or something, while they ran and jumped.

But then.... They were really hard to corral back into the cage at the end of
the night, so we thought we would just leave them out of the cage. So we
decided to leave the cage open so that their food and water were in there and
they could use the bathroom in there (which they have always been good
about- except for poops, which i've read is common).  And they just live in
the whole guest room.  We still went into the room at least twice a day and
tried to make one of the visits last for at least one hour each day.

Anyway.... I'm wondering if we should have separated them at first, so that
they would have been more excited to have our company?  I mean, they have
each other for that, so we're just a source of food and cranberries to them.  
They will get almost into our laps to eat cranberries, but if we move or
attempt to touch them, they run away.  Also, I'm wondering if leaving them
out of the cage was also a bad idea as far as making them like us... We were
afraid that corralling them into the cage was so scary for them, that they
would associate us with that, but now, I don't know if we made a mistake.  
We tried putting them back in the cage after about a month of living outside
of it (we were going out of town and having a pet sitter), and they FREAKED
out.... At this stage in the game, is there anything we can do? My fiance wants
to get rid of them, and I almost don't disagree.... it's hard to accept that we
are going to have to feed and clean up after two animals that don't love us
and just live in the back of our house, for at least the next 10 years...

I had a bunny when i was younger and she was great!  So, I thought i knew
what I was doing.  I'm generally very good with animals... but it's just not
working out how we had hoped...

Please let me know if you have any advice.

Thanks so much!
Allison

Answer
Hi,

I'm not going to get into a greatly detailed answer here.

One, they on't like the predator cat in the house.  The cat doesn't like them.  They pick up on your tension and it makes them nervous.

further you don't spend enough time with them for them to properly bond with you.  You both probably smell like the cat which does not help the situation.

Top it off, you have a bonded pair of rabbits that have little incentive to bond with you, given how things are in the house.  They are still probably trying to get used to the house, and trying to settle into a routine.

I guess I am wondering why you brought rabbits into a house that has a cat known for hating small animals.  

It is not a good idea to break up a bonded pair.  

I would not say this cannot work.  You have a safe room for them, that the cat does not go into.  It has to stay that way.  I believe you are probably expecting them to bond with you quicker than your situation warrants.  If you were spending a lot of time in there with them, they would bond quicker with you.  But because you are not, your timetable is probably faster than theirs.

Rabbits are prey animals.  It takes much longer to develop trust with others than a dog or cat.  Trust is what keeps them alive.  Further you guys are stressed out about this, and rabbits are much more empathetic than dogs and cats (survival trait) and so your stress is projected to them.  You need to relax when you are in there, and realize rabbits are not lap animals, and don't enjoy being held - and if they don't trust you much, even reached for.  Just enjoy being in there with them.  Watch tv, read something, get down on their level, they will start getting curious and sniffing you,checking you out, etc.  Let them come to you.  Don't always reach for them.  They have to learn how to trust you and learn how to be around you.

Don't give up.  You are expecting too much from two pets you are hardly around, given their natures as rabbits.  It does pay off.

Lee

PS and make sure you try to get the cat fur and scent off you before going in there.