rat terrier pees when he sees me

Question
Hi Charlotte.  I hope you can help me on this one.  It has me very upset because I love my dog so much and I feel responsible for her current behavior.  My rat terrier(female) is only 4 months old and never would pee when I came home.  She would be excited and happy and would kiss me like crazy.  Unfortunately, one day we had an accident.  I was taking her and my other puppy out to go potty.  I was holding them both in my arms and as I went to grab the leash, "Lola", my rat terrier, got excited and leaped from my shoulder by pushing off with her hind legs.  She fell on my terrazo floor (pure concrete.  Her head hit the concrete first and then she landed on her side.  It was a miracle she was came out ok.  When she hit the floor she yelped and cried histerically, and so did I.  I guess I did more than she.  She licked and licked me until I could confirm that she was ok.  I believe that because of my reaction (non-stop crying) she got scared and peed.  Ever since then, when I come home and she sees me, even though she is happy and excited to see me, she pees.  She never did this before.  Moreoever, she pulls her ears back and lays low with ther tail down, and sometimes will even flip on her back to show her belly.  She's become skiddish when I try to pick her up.  She doesn't behave like this at all with anyone else.  How can I get her to feel comfortable with me again.  She was not like this before.  It breaks my heart to think that she believes I was the cause of her accident, or even worse that I might hurt her.  I know she percieves me as the Alpha dog but, at the same time I can see the dramatic change in her since she got hurt.
I would appreciate any suggestions.
Laura

PS.  The other puppy (brussels griffon) doesn't have this problem.  And I NEVER spank them.

Answer
Hi Laura;
Sounds like a traumatic experience for both of you.
Our children and our pets see us as their securuty when they are little.
The fall scared the dickens out of her, and she saw you get scared and lose it too, so maybe it seemed to her that it much have been more dangerous than she thought, and made the trauma stick with her more.
Instead of you being a sturdy rock for her to feel comforted by, and feel safe with, you lost it and she was put in a position of feeling like she had to be a rock and comfort you.
I don't think she believes you caused her accident, I think she is scared she will do somethig to upset you that much again. she is nervous because she is trying to show you she is a good girl, and is not going to scare you again by doing that BAd thing she did when she fell.
Oh the poor dumb fools that say " It is only a dog, they aren't that smart"!
I got a German shepherd puppy, when I was 20. I desparately wanted a baby and had lost 2 because I couldn't carry them past the third month.
I had animals all my life, and they were my babies, but wanting to have a baby, and being so desolute, afraid I was never going to be able to carry one, even more of my mothering instincts went out on this puppy.
when she was about 4 monyhs old, I came down from my neighbor's apartment, and fould Lady munching on a drinking glass I kept on the bathtub to mix my hair confitioner in ( long time ago.LOL)
I grabbed her up, crying my eyes out, and sped to the animal hospital, praying, promising her if she didn't die I would baby her forever, a really dramitic car ride.
That little stinker sat on the seat staring at me, and taking everything in.
She didn't die, it didn't even hurt her.
BUT! she took all that trauma mommy was in, and USED it !
When I left her alont for what SHE thought was too long, to go up and have coffee with Judy, she would have a glass in her mouth when I walked into the apt.
Yep, she would chomp some of it.
After the fourth screaming trip to the Vet, he told me,"In school we tried to feed a dog glass to see how big the chunks had to be. (I know, it freaked me out too that they experiment like that ), and we had to give them huge chunks before it didn't pass through without doing damage.
Of course it is a craps shoot when they do eat some, if it will hurt them or not. She is still a puppy, eating four times a day, so her intestinal tract stays expanded.
When she eats glass, watch her to see if you see blood coming from her mouth or her rectum. When you see blood, bring her in, I will do surgery nd she will be fine. We have quite a bit of time before she is in danger of bleeding to death internally.
Just give her some food to expand her intestines more, and watch her.
I came in the door one day, and she was munching on a double edged razor blade. Heaven only knows where she got that. Had to be from my husband;s razor, so I yelled at him for leaving a blade where she could get it. LOl
Anyway, when I came in and saw that, the panic hit again. I saw something shiny drip rom her mouth, and thought she was bleeding. It was a piece of the razor blade hiting the light just right.
I took her to her doctor anyway. It didn't even cut her inside her mouth.
Judy called one day and said come up for cofee, and when I put the phone down, Lady went to the kitchen and reared up on the counter and grabbed the lid to a Pyrex casserole dish, and looked at me threateningly. she was 7 months old then.
When I saw that, it made me mad at the litle rat. I paddled her butt!
Only time I ever spanked her.
Anyway, I spanked her, and chewed her out good.
She never ate glass again.
They ARE that smart.
That puppy knew very well how upset you were. She just didn't know why, so she thought it was her fault for scaring you.
The pulling her ears back, and laying low, and turning her belly up is their way of showing submission.
she is showing you she is not a threat to you, please don't freak out again.
She was probably stunned by hitting her head,surprised and shocked that she fell, and of course it must have hurt some, so she was a little disoriented, and you were freaking out, so she just couldn't think with a clear head, besides she is too young to think that maturely, so like when a child has an accident, and mommy gets scared and cries, the child is likely to think it is their fault for scaring mommy and they are in trouble.
The peeing is because she has an overload of nerves.
Just sooth her, and tell her what a good girl she is, and nurture her through this period.
when she feels confident that she is not in trouble, and feels safe from getting into trouble from something bad she did, the peeing when she is excited will probably stop.
One thing you can do to help it along a bit is to learn animal massage for dogs.
I got a video of the Tellington Touch method of animal massage.
You quickly learn by watching the video, just where to massage and how to do it, fo all sorts of things from, calming them down and helping to ease fear of thunderstorms etc, to excessive barking, aggression, and relief of pain from Arthritis, post surgery etc.
I can't recommnd this enough.
I use it all the time. It helps with training, by relaxing the dog and it speeds up the results of training.
I have helped my older dogs get more years of life and more quality to thos years by helping them with pain and stiffness from Arthritis etc.
A 5 minute massaged cured one of my dogs of fear of thunderstorms when she was 2 years old. We lost her at 15 years a couple weeks ago, and she had never been afraid of a thunderstorm again.
Massage does the same for the dogs it can do for humans, but you have to learn how to do it for a dog, because their anatomy and nervous system are different.
There are also videos for massaging cats, horses, and all kinds of animals.
Go to this site and read abou the massages, and I reccomend ordering the tape.
I think with a few massages you will be able to calm this little lady down and put her at ease, and help her with this problem in a short time.

   www.lindatellington-jones.com

I have raised many many animals, and 4 children and 2 of my grandchildren, and i can't tell there is much difference in raising them.
You get them, they become part of the family, and that adapt.
If a mother cat takes over a puppy and raises it, it grows up thinking it is a cat. LOl
They adapt to their surroundings, and they act like the family they are a member of, so they take on people-like ways.
Sounds like those babies are lucky enough to have a real good mommy.
Mush love and luck to all three of you.
Charlotte