new mare

Question
I am 36 years old, have had horses pretty much my whole life. I have tried not to let her scare me away, brush and talk to her when she is eating, if she pins her ears at me, i chase her off with a sharp shhht sound. Right now she is in a corall by herself with the baby. We have three other horses, all geldings and have not put her in with then yet.

We recently bought a nine year old mare. She is half quarter horse, 1/4 thouroughbred and 1/4 clyde. She has a colt that was born on Sep 4, so he about a month and a half old. We have had her for almost two weeks now. Usually when I try touch her she pins her ears at me and walks off. She sometimes grinds her teeth. She doesn't usually do this when she is eating oats or hay. I have tried not to pay too much attention to the foal in hopes that she will relax first. She was completly fine with the people that we bought her from. No aggresion towards them at all, a bit to me when we went to go look at her. I don't want to take any crap from her, but I don't want to let her away with it either. I would really like to get working with the baby, he is already learning bad habits from his mama, pinning ears at me... Any help would be muchly appreciated.

Answer
Hi Chris!

Your mare is just trying to sort out her world.  She has a new baby, a new home and new people to get used to.  That is a whole lot of change for this mare.  Just give her some time.  

Do NOT put her out with your geldings.  If you are looking for a war, this is how to get it!  The baby is not old enough or strong enough to hold his own with your geldings and your mare will defend her baby tooth and nail.  Keep them apart.  It will be tough enough to put one mare out with a band of geldings.  All of the geldings will be competing for her attention and you will be getting lots of kicking, biting and dominance behavior.  It may be a situation that will be pretty rough and might not work out in the end.  So, don't throw a baby out in that mix.  You are asking for disaster.

The mare is pinning her ears at you because you are not leader she can trust.  Even baby is saying he is higher on the dominance ladder than you are!  Yikes!  You, Chris have to make some major changes in how you "are" with these horses.  This mare may be more "horse" than what you are used to.  Mares, especially a stressed mare like yours, really become protective.  You are going to have to set limits and boundaries with her that not only establish your role as a leader but that builds her confidence in you as well.  I know it is a tall order!

For a while, I just want you to leave her alone.  Give her at least another month to just settle in.  Don't worry about doing anything with the baby, he is just too young.  People get in such a rush to do "stuff" and it is just not necessary.  Less is more with babies.  Let him be and let him grow.  You will never have success with the baby until you can get through to the mare anyway.  For now, just feed the mare and try and make her comfortable.  If she were my mare, I wouldn't mess with her unless I absolutely had to.  It is difficult to have to try and establish a relationship with a mare that is a new mom and new to you.  In a month or so, if you need to, halter your mare and do a little ground work with her.  Do not try and separate her from her baby, just do your little bits of ground work with her in her same pasture with her baby.  By now if you are a confident and secure handler, much of the ear pinning will be gone.  Your mare will be feeling more at home and more secure in her surroundings.  If in another months time, there is still ear pinning and threats, you will have to change YOU even more.

I want you to be all business around this mare.  Be secure and feel secure in yourself when you are around her.  Have a plan and know what you want to do and how you want to do it.  If you are not familiar with the ground work, watch the "Ground Work" DVD and book by Buck Brannaman.  If you have never seen this style of ground work, Buck's DVD will really help you.  

Let me know how things are going in a month.  I betting your mare settles in and starts to become a secure member of your little herd.  If you are still having issues with your relationship, let me know and we will work through them.  Please watch the DVD.  It is really important.

Smiles, Denise

PS:  I am going to add some additional information on changing her behavior, I just need a bit more time and I still have two horses to ride.  So, more info is on the way to you!  Thanks for your patience!