DINKY

Question
Hi Dana,
Thank you for all your replies, they are gratefully received, and for your care and understanding, they are truly appreciated.
But Dinky lost his battle for life last night.
We brought him home Tuesday afternoon, he just was laying on his side. I had to prop him up, wedged inbetween towels to feed him,supporting his right side,and head, and give him water. He tried to get up a couple of times, but it was just too exhausting for him.His eyes were glazed and unblinking.
The Doctors said he was paralyzed on his right side probably due to a stroke.
Yesterday afternoon, I could see his breathing had become very shallow, and laboured, I propped him up and gave him water and his last meal, the little he would eat, and a little of his favourite banana, and layed him back down on his side, on his favourite blanket, with his favourite toy.Dinky was dying.
By the time the Doctor got to the house, she evaluated him, staying with us, for 2 hours, and told us he was totally blind, and his blood pressure was almost nil.He was twitching prior to seizure. As we put him to sleep, and I was holding him, he licked my hand for one last time, and was still.
I do not want you to think I gave up on Dinky, I didn't. He had had, 32 Vet visits in the past year, many to Dr.Hess, for numorous things from tooth problems to ulcers,oral abcesses,anorexia, inappetite, GI tract shutdown, teeth surgery, I could go on. He has his first seizure February 2004.He'd had radiographs done, and had a 5 weekly check-up, always to evaluate him. Everyone told me to cherish the time I had with him.I would take him for 2nd, even 3rd evaluations.
I had been feeding Dinks with Critical Care for the last nine months three times a day, and hand feeding him his favourites, when he didn't eat them himself, he needed to be bathed and groomed daily,as he stopped trying to clean himself.
When I let him out for his run to be with me, he didn't follow me anymore, (I used to call him my shadow)he just layed on the floor beside me, or cuddled in my arms.Occasionally he would trot around some, but then would be tired.
I cherished every moment I had with Dinky, trying to make each day special for him, and we had a bond together, that can NEVER be replaced, or I don't know if I ever will experience again.
I adored him, and he adored me, that much I am certain.
I started working from home the last 9 months, so I would be there for him, and if I had to go to the store, everyone thought I was in a game show, because I just wanted to rush back, to see he was okay. I constantly lived in dred of the day that Dinky was no longer there. I have one other Bunny left now, who has been diagnosed with Collegan nevus, who we talked about, and three cats, eldest 18 years, who equally had to have love also.
I knew there would come a time, when I would have to let go and do the best thing for Dinky, because it was never about me.I think I managed to mantain a quality of life for him worth living to the final days, he truly knew he was loved, and truly gave that love back,  a bond I will never forget.
I hope he is playing with my little Peanut now, but I know Mum isn't there to take care of him anymore. I was blessed to hold him close for 7 and a half years, through all our struggles, but it is never enough is it.?I will always ask could I have done more.
Thank you for listening to me, and replying to me, I do truly appreciate it.
Gina


Answer
Dear Gina,

What a lovely tribute to a brave little soul.  Your vet was so very kind to come to Dinky's side to help him cross the bridge, rather than have you bring him to that scary place where they were trying so hard to help him.  

Dinky could not have had a better "mom" than you, and I know you and your vets did everything possible to help him.  But we are only mortal.  

I will light a candle for Dinky tonight.  And I send you many healing thoughts.

Sincerely,

Dana