Should I break up a bond?

Question
QUESTION: Hello Dana, we have many rescue bunnies as pets which I've bonded most over the years.  Many are in boy/girl pairs, some same sex.

One pair I did 1-2 yrs. ago is a good match except over the last few months Onslow (male)dominates Little Daisy (female) whenever they're out and about.  Both are small bunnies and Onslow is about 7 yrs. old and is still going crazy (neutered of course).  He goes all over the place, teases the ones that are in their pens at the time (they've gotten used to his antics).  Onslow sometimes just sits and stares or lies down by one or 2 that he likes through the bars.  

Whenever Little Daisy comes into the middle of the room, he gets up and 'ushers' her back to the plant stand or somewhere else where she just sits.  I go over and tell her to come out or I pick her up (she's very affectionate).  They don't fight and I haven't seen Onslow bullying her eating/drinking (he's not a crochety bunny by any means).  

I know you're not supposed to break up bonds and it would be more work for me too trying to find a place to put them separately, but I just get so bothered when they're out in whatever room and he wants to keep her in 'her place'.  Meanwhile he goes all around doing what he wants to.

Any suggestions?  Both are healthy as far as I know.

Thanks,
Paula

ANSWER: Dear Paula,

If Daisy were really perturbed by her bossy mate's antics, she wouldn't put up with it.  The fact that they don't squabble means that she's perfectly happy with the arrangement, and I've seen this many times in my rabbits.  Male rabbits will often herd their female mates away from other rabbits, but I've also seen this just as often in reverse ("Stay away from that floozy!")

So we need to put aside our tendency to anthropomorphize the bunnies and think of them as sexist.  :)  They're just doing what bunnies do:  keeping their loved ones away from what they consider rivals or threats.  Separating them would be cruel and completely unnecessary.  They are truly bonded, and they belong together forever.

As long as they don't fight, and as long as Daisy does her buddy's bidding, she's fine with the situation, or you'd know it.

Hope this helps.

Dana

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thank you so much for the info Dana.  I feel SO much better!  I never did want to break them up and I knew it would be wrong but I just felt so sorry for Little Daisy.  Anyway, now I can ease my mind.

I'd like to ask 1 more thing.  I have 7 singles out of the bonded pairs in our house, some from losing partners in the past and others as new adoptions.  There are 3 girls who have lost their partners within the past few months and after going through a 'grieving' period, they've come around wonderfully and have even more personality than when they had partners.  

None of them will take to any of the other singles I've tried to bond them with (separately of course).  Are they happy the way things are now and just don't want a new partner?  We do not have the room to take in anymore new bunnies.

Also, our New Zealand is pretty bumptious and I've tried a few males with her (all smaller of course) and have had to grab them away when she went to bite them.  She could inflict some serious damage if she connected and it comes out of nowhere.  She seems very happy, should I leave her alone?  

I have another bunny too that always wants to attack out of fear even after 2 yrs.  He's just a little thing and grunts & growls no matter how nice we are to him (he came from a very bad existence as a baby).  I've tried him with many bunnies over the last couple of years.  He loves affection when it comes down to it but he lashes out at any other bunny, in the tub.  If you go to pet the other bunny, he lunges at your hand and the other one's head.  That of course makes the other one angry.  

I know I've asked more than 1 question but they're all pretty much related and if you have any ideas, I'd love to know.  I don't want to make any bunnies sick either with the stress of bonding as I've had bunnies get gas or upset with a stressful event.

Ideally I'd love them ALL to be in pairs again but I'm having such a hard time with the singles now.

I've gotten a little gun-shy over the years and kind of want to leave them be if they seem happy.

Thank you so much!
Paula

Answer
Dear Paula,

This is a really *great* question, and I wrestle with it myself sometimes.  In fact, right now.  Malcolm is 10+ years old, and lost his mate (Fiona) a few months ago.  He seems quite content on his own (though we're currently battling a nasty squamous cell carcinoma on his eyelid; yuck), and actually *runs away* from every potential mate we've brought to keep him company.  He just doesn't seem interested in bonding with anyone else, though I know he enjoys eating his salad across the pen-bars from our big, lovable Elinor.  Eating is a social rabbit activity, even when two bunnies aren't bonded, and I don't think he feels lonely because the other rabbits are nearby and he can interact with them, if not physically and directly.

The other is Vash, our huge (11 lbs) big muffin who lost his old, decrepit partner Fenris (who was 15+ years old when he passed peacefully a few weeks ago).  Vash, too, seems quite content on his own.  He's in a place where he's constantly around people when we're home, and he thrives on that attention.  But he has so far run away from any females we've tried to introduce--maybe because he just hasn't found the right one.  So we're not pushing it.  He seems very happy to be on his own, as long as he has plenty of human interaction, and he can interact with other bunnies from a distance, which keeps him occupied.

Elinor is the big girl I mentioned before, and while she has *friends* among our rabbits, her original mate (Elmo, a wee black lionhead mix) has decided he'd rather be in another clan that lives mostly outside in our predator-proof garden.  Elinor, having been rescued from a bad outdoor situation, has no interest in going outside, so when Elmo comes to visit her for a little while, then goes back out, she goes to the door and kind of moons after him.  I know she'd love to have him stay with her, and that situation is a little bit heartbreaking.  But she is fairly content, too, and very dependent on the human love.

So I guess it depends on the bunny and the situation.  If your singletons are happy and don't seem to be pining, I would not try to force bonding.  It creates more stress than it's worth.  But if they seem lonely, then at least be sure they are close to other bunnies with whom they can interact across a barrier so they know they are not completely alone.  That often seems to do the trick, and we have bachelors who are quite content to be by themselves.

Each situation is different, and it sounds as if you might have several confirmed singletons.  You may find that a new bunny comes into the house and suddenly is the perfect mate for one of them.  But maybe not.  Only time will tell.  Until then, I'd leave the situation as it is and not try to make them like each other.  It's really going to be up to them, in the end.

Hope this helps.

Dana