rat terrier/jack russel mix always scared of my husband

Question
I asked a question awhile ago when my husband and I had just adopted 3 dogs from the shelter and the jack russell was being too aggressive. With your guidelines and suggestions - he is doing great and is such a sweetheart.

However our jack russell/rat terrier, Spidey, who is about a year old (who we adopted at the same time with the other 2) - is terrified of my husband. When we first brought them home, he was just so happy to be out of the shelter. Then we went on a vacation about a month later and had to leave them in the kennel for a week. After we got back - he started acting really weird around my husband, Mike, and is now at the point where he always has his tail tucked under when Mike is around and pees whenever he tries to pet or console him. A couple of times he got so scared of Mike (if he tried to take him outside or call him over) that he pooped right where he was.

There are very few times where Mike can get Spidey to sit on his lap and lick his face.
I'm thinking he was badly abused by his previous male owner before he was taken to the shelter. He is totally fine with females and the men that come to the house and I haven't seen him act like this w/ any other men.
Mike is extremely upset that Spidey is terrified of him and doesn't want him to be constantly stressed out and wishes Spidey knows he would never hurt him in a million years.
Any advice will be greatly appreciated.  We're in a bind now to where Mike is suggesting Spidey is better off in another home where he's not stressed. But I'm willing to try everything and can't fathome the thought of giving him away.
Thanks in advance.

Answer
Iris -

I'm so glad that your jack russell has gotten a grip on himself !

Now, for poor Mr. Spidey.  I recommend that someone figure out what treat really makes him go ape. It's often cheese, tiny bits of hotdog, tiny pieces of bacon etc.

Then, have him miss a meal so he's very hungry.

Then work it out so Mike can feed him tiny bits of treat... many many tiny bits. Ideally, Mike would not be looking at him, or otherwise touching him. Initially, he shouldn't even talk to him.  The point is to give him all these tiny treats while acting like he's not even there - you may have to hold him for this.

Do this every day until Mike can gradually speak to him while doing it, then looking at him.... etc.

I would then recommend that Mike feed him every meal.  Now that you have him willing to take treats, have Mike start hand feeding him his kibble.

Basically you are looking to desensitize poor Spidey. It's also important to remember that rat terriers are, by nature, much more anxious and tense than most other dogs.

I call this process patient persistence. You are sticking to something even though it's not giving you the result you want right off the bat.  You just need to wait it out while Spidey goes through the process of learning to be safe with Mike.

About a year ago, I fostered a dog who would bite any man he could get near. It was all about fear.  Tchai started to do a little better, but the real breakthrough was when I took him to obedience classes.  Once he learned that he was safe in that situation, he turned around. He was actually adopted by a woman who lives in NY City.

I hope this gives you some ideas of where to start !

-Beth