cat/kitten behavior

Question
We adopted a three month old part Siamese kitten from a "foster" home in October. Our only requirements were that she get along with our dog and that she be a lap cat.

She gets along fine with the dog, but she doesn't like to be held. She will stay in a lap about 30 seconds before she starts to "squeak" (she has a funny voice, neither meow nor Siamese sound) and is desperate to get down.
She follows us from room to room, likes to be stroked, rubs against our legs and gives kisses, but only on her terms. She often sleeps with my daughter, who has a large bed, and seems friendly enough.
We've been told she may change as she gets older and more sedate, but I wonder if the behavior stems from the fact that she may have had early socialization to cats rather than humans. Her foster home had many cats, but also human contact.

I'd appreciate knowing of any experience you've had with a situation like this. She's a beautiful and sweet cat, fine in every other way, but we miss the cuddling!

Thanks,


Answer
Nora,

Siamese cats, as a breed, tend to be lap cats on their own terms!  Thus, the behavior of your part Siamese is no surprise.

It sounds to me as if she is super affectionate, again, on her terms.  This is not necessarily a socialization trait as much as a trait of the more active breeds (e.g. Siamese, Burmese, Abyssinian, Tonkinese, Japanese Bobtails, Cornish Rex, etc.).  

My advice is the best way to get some of these more active breeds to cuddle is to get them to think it is their idea.  I found that if you completely ignore them, they often cannot stand it and will come to you.  If they just rub up against your legs, ignore it. Often they will get so frustrated that you are not paying attention to them, they may get more assertive by jumping up and demanding attention by, possibly, even getting in your lap!  Then you reward by stroking them.  Some don'ts:

Don't pick the cat up to cuddle!

Don't surround or restrain the cat in any way, once it gets into your lap!

Don't, under any circumstances, go to the cat!

I think this can go a long way into getting this kitten to think that having you cuddle her is her idea!  

Like anything else, this type of approach will take patience and perseverance.  So, please do not expect an instant turn around.

Best regards... Norm.