taking in a feral

Question
Hi and thanks in advance for your opinion on this.  I'll try to be brief, but don't want to leave out anything pertinent, so please bear with me.  I think my problem is an ethical dilemma for me, so it's more of a what to do instead of a how-to question.  Here goes.

I live in a semi-rural area with a farm across the street, so we see lots of feral cats.  I throw food scraps out almost daily, so they are in my yard often.  One of the female "regulars" showed up with 2 kittens at the start of November, and I would put the kittens at 3 1/2 to 4 months old now.  I have been feeding them (kitten chow) since they showed up, and the kittens are no longer nursing.  The mother now trusts me and even purrs and loves to be petted, so I'm not sure feral is the right term for her.  One of the kittens (they are both male) is very skittish and shy while the other one is very social and has bonded with me.  I would like to take him in and give him a home, but don't know when or if I should, and am hoping for your opinion on this.  He still spends most of the day with the mother and I don't want to break up the family, but I'm also afraid of waiting too long and something bad happening to him.  I feel some urgency about this now because the other kitten is missing today and I fear the worst.  If he reappears, I would probably take him in, as well, as I think he could be socialized, too.

We currently have 3 indoor only cats, 2 males and 1 female, and a dog.  I'm comfortable that I could integrate the kitten in question into the family, as we've taken in numerous strays and have had 6 cats at one point.  We have ample room and can provide medical care for the kitten and possibly his brother if he returns.  However, taking the mother in doesn't seem to be an option.  I don't think she would ever "blend" with the others.  

What would you do?  Maybe it's silly, but I'm concerned about the mother and don't want to snatch her baby, but I'm also worried about the kitten (especially since the brother is missing now).  We live in a high traffic area, there are lots of feral toms roaming around, and we have coyotes.  Is now the time to take the kitten in, and if (okay, when) I do, should I continue to feed the mother?  She has been sleeping with the kittens in a box on our porch on cold nights - should I remove the box?  Should I let her see the kitten through the door? (I would not be willing to let him back outside.)  If the other kitten returns, should I try to bring him in, too?  I'm afraid bringing them both in would create 2 distinct "broods" that wouldn't mix as readily as just the one kitten blending with our other cats.

Also, I have been letting this kitten come inside for brief periods almost every day and he loves our children and the dog.  (He hasn't had any contact with the other cats, and wouldn't until he has a clean bill of health from the vet.)  He seems to enjoy being inside and plays and purrs, but sticks close to the door if the mother is on the porch.  However, if the mother's roaming, I have to push him back outside.  I would greatly appreciate your opinion and advice on what to do.  Thanks for your time on this.  

Answer
Hi Tracey,

Are you sure you're not in rescue, you sound like one of "us"!  Thanks for taking such an interest in these guys and I hope the brother returns.
Are you in a financial position to spay the mom?  That would prevent future kittens and discourage the feral toms from coming around.  I would keep the box out for her, its probably the best shelter she gets.  Taking in the kittens won't be nearly as traumatic for any of them as you think.  Cats adjust to new situations very quickly and the mom would have been kicking them out of the nest pretty soon anyway.  In not too long they won't even recognize each other.  I would definitely bring the other kitten in if he comes back.  Cats don't have the pack mentality that dogs do so their alliances constantly change.  They may be better buddies with each other than the with the other kitties, at least initially, but then they'll start socializing with the others and form new relationships.  The nice thing about having a lot of cats is that they accept new cats into the group easier, they don't feel as territorial as a solitary cat does.  I don't think you'll have any problem integrating these two into your household and thank you for doing so.