kicking filly

Question
Hi, My filly just turned a year old she is halter broke, grooms, lifts feet,loads, she is a good filly, here comes the but, in the past few weeks she has deliberately pinned her ears turned her bum toward me and kicked. I dont know why she is doing this, I'm not doing any thing different, do you have any idea why she would start this?  Tnakyou
 Bea


Answer
Hi Bea!

I'm guessing that your filly is turning and kicking at you when she is loose in the pasture or stall?  The very clear message she is sending is that she does not respect you!  Kids these days!  She is getting older and more confident and sorting out her world.  She is coming up with a plan on her own that does not include you!  Some of the signs of this behavior developing were missed.  It starts in very subtle ways with her getting disrespectful and pushy and finally develops into full on kicking.  She is doing to you what she would be doing to a less dominate herd mate.  You have to change the relationship, NOW!

Heres how...Be very aware of her behavior when you are around her.  No more cuddles.  Be very businesslike in your approach to her.  Not angry, scared, worried or submissive...business only.  You are the teacher, and she is starting to be the bully in the classroom.  Keep her focused on being IN class.  Keep her focused on her tasks.  

When you are around her she only gets to approach you when you ask her too, and only if she is kind and respectful.  If she is pinning her ears, send her away.  Do what it takes and no more.  If you miss signs that she is preparing to turn and kick at you and she actually gets shaped up to kick, take the tail end of your lead rope and give her a nip on the bumm.  Make it meaningful!  Don't swat at her or pick on her.  Give her a good sound nip like her mother would do for the same behavior!  Do it once, make it count and don't pick.  This is something she would not get away with if her mother was in the picture.  You have to take on the role of a good mare!  Don't allow your baby to become the class bully.  Teach her now how to become a good citizen.  

It would be nice if you could do this in a round pen, stall or small pasture.  If she is not out with other horses or in a large pasture, finishing this lesson could be more difficult for the human.  What I want you to do next is to hook her on and get her to face up on you.  This is, after you have sent her away or given her a nip on the bumm, when she looks at you again, take a step back and draw her in.  If she ignores you and stands tail toward you, move her.  Do what it takes to get her to move and consider you as important.  It may be that all you have to do is to drive her off with your body by stepping into her in such a way that it tells her to leave.  You may have to go so far as to give her another nip with the tail end of your lead!  Do only what it takes and no more.  

When she turns and faces up on you, get soft.  Let her know in your body language that she has found the answer.   Now step toward her in a way that tells her you want her to stay.  If she starts to leave, stop your feet, wait a moment for her to come still, and then approach again.  If she feels she has to leave, then help her go and start over with trying to approach her.  She will finally stay.  When she does, rub her like the mare would.  Do NOT pat!!! Rub.  Make it feel good.  Let her know that when she is a good citizen, it feels good!  If things fall apart and she gets snotty, start all over from the beginning.  Don't get angry or frustrated, it's no big deal.  It took some time to develop this behavior, it will take some time to get it fixed.  

Remember, don't try and go through something bad and come out good.  Stop and start over.  Ray Hunt

Try this out Bea.  Let me know how it is going.  If I have used terms or concepts that you are not familiar with, let me know and I will clarify!

Have fun with your baby!  This could be the best horse of your life!

Smiles!  Denise