have I made a mistake

Question
I haven't had any experience with horses since I was a teenager, now close to 45, I purchased a 3 year old gelding-he was bought from a trainer and has 90 days on him-I would NEVER had bought such a young horse but he was so mellow and well behaved every time I saw him before the purchase. I also adopted 2 yearlings from BLM-mustangs-stallions, they get along ok most of the time but the 3 year old acts like the neighborhood bully. pinning his ears back and charging one or the other-biting (not severe-yet)not letting them eat in peace until he is comfortable-I got three of them on the same day-2 yearlings were already mates-I have had them in the paddock for almost 2 weeks and plan on letting them into the pasture in a few days-is all this behavior normal? this 3 year old is a bit intimidating to me-he's very big and he won't keep his head down for me to bridle-I don't think it's the bit-I'm using a snaffle I was told by the trainer he has been using a shank so I purchased a very short shank with a broken bit-(argentine), also a new headstall, the first time I put it in his mouth I noticed his mouth was a little bloody-I couldn't tell if it was gums or tongue-wasn't the corners though-now he puts his head up when I try to get him to take the bit-I have read about getting him to keep his head down and putting honey or something on the bit and I am going to try it but is him acting like a bully him sensing my intimidation or his age-I usually don't ever strike animals but last bight he was such a jerk I popped his butt-I do believe in speaking with a disapproving tone and "NO's" and the like-I think he is a sweet boy but have I made a mistake by purchasing such a young horse or does this all sound pretty normal for his age and level  

Answer
Elaine,

Boy, when you jump back into having horses again you do it in a big way!  A 3 yr. old with only 90 days on him?  For one, I won't even ride 3 yr. olds because they are still very structurally immature.  At 3 a horse is the equivalent of an 18 yr. old human.  He's got a lot of growing to do yet.  

Yes, he is bullying the other 2 yearlings, partly because they are little ones and probably partly because they are still colts.  But, they are Mustangs and know how to get along in a herd environment so they will work it out eventually.  I would get both of them gelded as soon as is practical though. Wait until fly season is over with then get them both done.  In the meantime just be prepared for some battle damage.  

As far as the 3 yr. old he needs a lot more work.  Sounds like he might have bitten his tongue when you put the bit in.  Are you sure you've got the bridle fitted properly?  There should be only 1 wrinkle at the corners of his mouth with the bit in.  And the corners of his mouth should not rest right up against where the shanks attach to the bit itself.  There should be a little space there.  And since he's had one bad experience now you have to undo that.  It does sound like you may not have gotten an appropriate bit for him.  If possible show it to the trainer who worked with him and see how he feels about it.  It may be too small for him.  Correcting something like this can take a lot of time because you have to build trust that it won't happen again.  I usually fit the bit in very carefully with a youngster and reward them when they take the bit.  It takes a while but they get the idea.  

Behavior wise, he will test you, just like a teenager does a new teacher.  You will need to lay down the law as to what is acceptable behavior and stick to it.  

I just don't know if you are up to handling this young a horse in all honesty.  You need to work on getting his respect.  If you have a round pen do some work in there with him to get him to realize that if he doesn't want to cooperate with you then he will have to work.  You can use any of the methods, Parelli, Lyons whatever.  Get your hands on one of their books and follow the directions for work in the round pen.  If you don't have a round pen then a lunge line will work if you know how to use one.    The round pen work will help with the Mustangs too.  You need to work with them now while they are young.  

I wish I could give you more help but I think that doing some studying will help more than anything else.  Just remember to keep things simple and be 100% consistent.  It takes and enormous amount of time and patience to work with youngsters and you've got 3 right now.  

Let me know if there is anything else I can help you with as you go along.  

Lyn