Socializing Siamese Cats

Question
Dear Norman,

We recently adopted a rescued 5 (now 9) week old male Siamese/Abyssinian kitten and already have two old male cats and one 3 year old female Siamese/Tabby cross.

The two older males get along OK with the kitten, one has generally always been grumpy so he doesn't like to play but the other (the oldest) oddly enough plays every now and then.

The reason we adopted the kitten was because of the 3 year old female Siamese. She loves to play and was getting on the older males nerves, so we decided to get the kitten as a playmate/someone closer to her age.
The problem we're having though is she is not socializing with the kitten at all. She hisses and spits at him and is petrified to the point where she doesn't come inside the house anymore until its late at night and everyone is asleep.

She's always been loving and loves human attention, but I'm worried that the new kitten is too much for her.
How do we get her to warm up to the kitten and come to terms with the fact that he's here to stay?

I'm so worried about her going missing because she feels shes not getting enough attention at home anymore...
Any help would be amazing!!

Regards,
Erin

Answer
Erin,

Cats have their own rules of socialization, and, even when we think we know how things can turn out, we can be wrong.  When a new player is introduced into an existing community, things may be turned topsy turvy for a while. The 3 year old may or may not get along with the new kitten, and there is little you can do about it except wait and see.  It sometimes takes many weeks or months for things to settle down.

About the only thing I can suggest is that when the new kitten is around, see if you can ply your 3 year old female with lots of special attention and treats. Spend lots of time with your 3 year old, especially giving her personal attention and play.

Please let me know what develops.

Best regards... Norm.