Feedback and thanks

Question
Dear Charlotte,
I want to thank you for such a thoughtful response.  What you said
made a lot of sense and Im
glad I came to you with my delemma.  It reminds me of how Lux, at 2
years old, immediatly knew
Buckley was a new baby- an addition to the pack- and wouldnt get too
close, shook with
excitement, and wouldnt leave his side..  We were worried too that she
would bark at him or want to
attack him because she had started acting that way twards other dogs
months before. Her
response completley amazed us.  She's also always had a sweet layed
back side.  Now, she's a bit of a push over with her brother.  I will do
my
best to make Buckley feel secure with this trasition but Im not sure he'll
be able to give to the
baby the way Lux gave to him.  As of now, If me or my husband goes
to pet Lux he immediatly
gets up to steal our hands away from her.  Perhaps he is less secure in
general.  I am going to
talk with him and try to connect with him about expecting a baby.  
These greyhounds are
minitures, more hyper for sure.  Im not sure if they make as good
"nannys" as Lady who sounds
exceptionally kind and nurturing.  But Lady's behavior might come
from your good parenting and
theres no reason to hold on to such a limiting belief that Buckley
couldn't be the same.

Thank you.  Feel free to write back if there is something more I should
know or do that comes to
mind.  Otherwise, Thank you so much.  You've helped tremendously.
Take care!

Karinne  

-------------------------
Followup To
Question -
Dear Charlotte B.

Hi.  I have two itailian greyhounds, Lux age 3 and Buckley age 1
yr 3 mo.  I just started to have problems with Buckley
peeing but mostly pooping in the house.  About 3 1/2 weeks
ago I left work on a maternity leave with my 1st (Im nearing 8
mo. pregnant).  I thought with the extra time at home the dogs
would be happier and better behaved as I have always been firm
and consistant.  It is my knowlege that IGs take about 1 1/2
years, perhaps even a bit longer to completely stop having
accidents in the house.  Thats what it took for Lux.  Buckley was
doing so well for so long.  I thought he was pretty much reliable
like his sister but maybe a little over week ago he started
consistantly going in the house.  It started with me reading on
the bed and what sounded like peeing by the bed- I thought, no-
but sure enough.  Another time when the bedroom door was
closed he left a pile of poop outside the door. Over the week,  
my husband has woke up to come downstairs and find pee and
poop in the cage they both sleep in, possibly 5 times.  (they are
locked up while we're not home and at night.)  Buckley knows he
is not allowed to do this in the house or in his cage.  He has
been so incredibly whiny; he is naturally more vocal than Lux.  I
realized yesterday while playing the piano he was just whinning
for attention because I had just watched him go 1&2 outside.
When I finally stopped playing and turned around and stared at
him he got wound up and barked at me.  The thing is after he
poops I dont feel like smothering him with love and attention.  
He's been so needy its been irritating me.  Im not sure why this
is now become apparent as the first couple weeks seemed fine.  
Do you believe that dogs respond to a pregnancy or perhaps are
they responding to the way I am acting?  Now that Im home he
seems to reqire that much more attention from me.  Do I try to
give him all he's requesting?  Should he get used to the fact that
Im home but cant give him as much attention as he requests?  
Because in 5 weeks Im going to be home just as much but have
much of my attention on the baby.  Id hate for him to start
acting up again all the while caring for an infant for the first
time.  Im open to all suggestions and feedback because right
now no one's happy.

Thanks very much for your time and consern.  I appriciate it.

Karinne
Answer -
Hi Kariine;
I wrote a long answer to this yesterday, and it registered that it posted,
but today it is not here.
That happens every once in a while, sooooooo, here we go again.
Dogs DEFFINATELY react to a pregnancy!
With Buckley, it counds like the same situation as if you had a 3 or 4
year old child that was
mommy's baby, and a little interloper was coming on the scene to
bump him out of his status.
He has a big sister, Lux, but he is the baby.
I talked to my dogs about "Our" baby. I had an 8 month old female
German Shepherd when I was
pregnant with my oldestchild. I had a miscarriage when Lady was only
about 2 months old, but
she was worried about me. she knew Iwas pregnant before I did, and
we lived in Houston, and
she wouldn't let me go in the water at the beach.
She would get my bathing suit(and a little piece of me) in her teeth and
pull me out.
She watched over me like I was made of dresden china, and would pull
me into my bed when she
thought I needed to lie down and rest.
She mother-henned me to death!
She also took that kind of care of my children after they got here.
Buckley will be the same way with that child.
IF ! You include the dogs in the family, and it is THEIR baby too.
Lady would put her head on my stomach and feel the baby kick, and
listen to it.
When I brought the child home from the hospital, Lady took her bed
beside the crib and that is
where she slept from then on..
When one of them had a sniffle or a temp. Lady would wake me. If one
of the children was a litle
bit sick, she never left the side of their bad, except to go outside to
poop. I had to bring her food
and water by the bed, or she would just not have any. she would not
leave her baby.
She was such a help.I lost her to old age, before my fourth child was
born, and I then found out
what it was really like to take care of a baby.LOl
I was always watchful of my children, but as long as I had Lady, I didn't
really need to be, she
watched them constantly, and was never more than a few feet from
them.
When I brought Paula (my oldest)home from the hospital, I sat down in
myrocker with her
andtookthe bllankets away soLady could see the baby.
I told her not to lick the baby's face or hands.
The rest she could lick, and she just laid her cheek on Paula's legs and
closed her eyes.
She just loved that baby so much, and the other two I had while she
was still alive.
If your dog is healthy,and kept clean and groomed,( don't mean
bathing all the time),there is no
danger to your baby's health.
If fact, reserch that was done over a long period of years, and released
last year, showed,
children that lived in the house with a pet or pets from birt on, had
fewer incidences of allergies
and asthma.
When a family has animals, and treat them like family members, and a
baby comes into the
family, and the parents relegate the animal to animal status, doesn't
allow it near the baby, etc,
the animal loses it's secure place in the family, and it will naturally
resent that baby.
Say someone has a dog, and they treat it like a family member, and the
new baby comes, and the
dog gets put outside, screamed at every time it gets near the baby,
maybe hit, that is why you
sometimes hear of a family pet attacking the new baby.
Their life changes, and they are put out, so naturally they become
jealous, and want to be rid of
that threat to them.
When it is THEIR baby too, and they are allowed to love it, and mom
and dad include the animals
in the family circle still, the animals love the baby and become
protective of it.
When my children were babies, and  was trying to get something done,
and they wanted to be
held, or played with, and I wanted to take a few minutes to finish what I
was doing, Lady would
go to the baby and keep them happy.
Paula loved to hear Lady bark, and she would stand up in her baby seat
and yell. Lady would
bark, and Paula would collapse laughing. They would keep this up for
quite awhile. It was loud,
but the baby was perfectly happy.
When the girls were about 3 and 4, I would tie a sturdy cloth on the
tongue handle of their little
red wagon, and Lady would grip the cloth in her teeth, and pull them in
that wagon as long as
they wanted her to.
It was like having a live-in nanny.
Make buckley a part of the baby;s life too, call it our baby, and
reassure him you still love him to.
Small children have to be reassured the new baby is not displacing
them, and so do your dog
babies.
Dogs are more like us than you think.
They are pack animals, and do not thrive if they are alone.
They, by nature live in a family ( the pack). there is an Alpha and a
Beta. Boss and second in
command.
When they live with humans, the humans are their pack. Mom and dad
are the alpha and Beta.
Children born to the family or new animal;s brought to the home,
become pack members, and
part of their responsibility to prtoect.
Greyhounds are by nature protective and social within their pack.
You have some natural born baby sitters there. Take advantage, and
enjoy that whole pack,
family.
Let Buckley be big brother and sister.
Oh, why he barked when you started at him?
Staring at a dog is a challenge to fight.
He probably couldn't understand why you were challenging him to
fight, and the bark meant
"STOP IT!"
anything you think I can hel with, or if you need clarification of
anything here, feel free to write
anytime.
Charlotte  

Answer
Know what Karinne?
I think he will.
That baby is one more person to spoil him.
Max the dictator, my little Lhasa male. He was a rescue i fostered and just HAd to keep, rules rowdy, and australian shepherd mic rescue I juat HAd to keep.LOL
Rowdy was one when we got Max ( Maximillain, after the conqueror of Mexico). Max was about 6 weeks old. rowdy took over that puppy, and slept with him cuddled up to him, saw that Max ate forst, all that, like he was that puppy's momma.
He lets Max treat him like dirt still, and boss him around. He is 7 and Max is 6 now.
Silky ( our English Setter, and the queen of the house)let that little tyrant know right from the first she would not tollerate it, so Max behaves himself with her, and with Laddie, a Sheltie we took a couple of years ago.
Rowdy and Laddie are very xompetitive, and steal the hand, like you say, if the other is getting petted.
BUT,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
That is with mom and dad and the adult kids. with the grandchildren, they fawn over them, and the younger the child, the more attention it gets from all the dogs.
and they ar SOOOOOO protective of those children.
If you want to write me at my email, it is
charlotte34@verizon.net
I will send you some pics of my dogs with the grandchildren. I have one of Max checking out the new great-grandbaby.
I have those in files on my puter so I can email them.
I think they see themselves as the older siblings, just under mom and dad, and the new babies are their's as much as anyone else's.
Buckley is a spoiled brat, just like Max is, and Lux helped spoil him.LOL
If a baby cries, just a little bit, all my dogs go into a frenzy with all the adults, like we can't get to that baby fast enough to suit them.
Just a little uhuh, from a baby, and those dogs are looking at us like, MOVE IT!
My daughter-in-law was a tad miffed at her little 4 year old, because he wanted her to tie his shoes, and she wanted him to do it for himself, and she said in a "Aw, you're a big boy" tone of voice, Ok, here let me do it. Laddie thought Will was in trouble and I guess he thought she was going to beat the child.LOl
Will was sitting on the floor at Maria's feet, and Ladie jumped in his lap, and wouldn't let her get close enough to even tie his shoes.LOl
It was really funny. Laddie was blocking her, and pushed her hand with his paws, when she tried to reach for the kid's shoes.
She said "GEESH!, Your dogs make me feel like a child beater"
I think if one of the parents swatted a bottom, my dogs ,might even bite them.
They LOVE those grandkids.
I'll bet when that baby starts walking around, and getting into things, and you tell it no in a sharp voice, you will have to chew Buckley out for interfering.
I sure did with Lady ( and some of the others I've had ).
Lady was bigger, and when one of them got into throuble, and i was correcting them, she would wrap herself around them like, "Here honey, I'll protect you from the mean old witch".
Then I would have to chew her butt out for interfering.
When my oldest son was about 1-1/2 and 2, when he got into mischief, and was about to get chewed out, he would yell for Lady, and she would come running.LOL
It doesn't matter the size of the dog. a teeny little chihuahua will chew you up starting with you're ankles, if you mess with it's kid family.
My family had a little chihuahua when i was born, and Corky was my shadow.
A little play mate slapped me, when we were about 3 years old, and Corky bit her hand.
Caused a bit of a problem . He didn't do her real harm, and her parents knew Corky, and were animal people too, so they calmed down after my dad took her to the doctor, with her dad, and she was ok.
She was a bit slappy, and she had been nipped before for hitting some dog's kid.
worried how Lady would react if a kid got slappy with mine. a German shepherd can do a lot of damage.
When my oldest was about 5, i saw what she would do.
Some kids from up the street came down to play, and one of the little boys got snippy, and was trying to start trouble. Lady got between the kids, and raised up on his chest ( he was about 8 years old) and pushed him back, them she herded him to the sidewalk, and sent him home.
No growling, just got down to business and made her position plain. He came down often after that, but no more trouble.
she was good at training kids.LOl