getting cat & kittens to get along

Question
We have a 4 year old cat adopted for the humane society 2 years ago, (they told us she was very mothering to other cats.....).  We recently got 2 kittens (now 8 weeks old) so she wouldn't be alone and board while we're at work.  This is their 7th day together, the little ones spen dmost of their time playing together but sometimes bug Lexie (the older one).  Sometimes lexie just sits there and watches them, other times she will run after them and then sit back and watch but at other times she pounces on them and bites them (I think), it hard to tell.  The kittens don't cry at all and I break it up as soon as it happens becuase I'm afraid Lexie will hurt the littles ones.  When we're not home I separate the kittens from Lexie but when someone is home they are all allowed to be in the same room, this is how it has been since they came. We try to give Lexie a lot of attention but most of the time she doesn't want to be petted and walks off.  She used to meow ALL the time and that's reduced by 90% (good for us, but is that bad?).  I just want to know how much "fighting" between older and younger is normal and healthy and when to know that it's time to break it up.  Should I be doing anything else? Thanks for your help!

Answer
Jennifer,

It sounds to me as though Lexie and the kittens have reached an understanding.  I would not worry about Lexie hurting the two kittens.  If you ever watched little kittens play together and with their mama you would be appalled at how rough the play is.  Cats gave very, very tough skin and, were Lexie to really have hurt one of the kittens, you would know it!!!!!

So, what to do?  I would suggest no more human interference and no more separation of the kittens from Lexie when no one is home. In general human interference and separation tends to prolong the getting acquainted period between the established cat and new additions.

The fact that Lexie is not meowing like she used to may simply be that she is more interested in the kittens right now.  Adding the kittens to the household has changed the dynamics somewhat, so any change in Lexie's behavior toward you would not be surprising.  Cats have their own ways of doing things and you will just have to accept how the inter-relationships change and develop because of the new kittens.

Keeping separate litter pans for the time being is not a bad idea. The other thing is to not give the kittens undue attention in lieu of attention to Lexie (cats do get jealous).

Best regards... Norm.