2 sibling cats. one of the brothers just passed.

Question

Their last day togethe   how should i deal with this? they are 3 years old and have known only each other. Mr. Kitty had to be put down due to complications of feline leukemia. They were very close. His brother Stripey keeps searching his brothers old hiding places and seems very depressed. i have been holding vigil with Stripey on the porch but not sure if that is healthy. This is totally breaking my heart and would like some real advice.

Sincerely,
Lucas and Stripey

Answer
Hi Lucas,

I'm very sorry to hear about Mr. Kitty. Feline leukemia really sneaks up on you like that in most cases - seemingly healthy one day, and critically ill the next. Cats are so stoic, they hide the illness well.

How to deal with the loss is difficult. There is no one answer that fits all. In regards to Stripey, it's best if you don't change anything else in the near future. Try to keep any of his other routines, such as playtimes and feeding times, the same. If Mr. Kitty had belongings, I would try not to get rid of them yet. Try to spend a little extra time with Stripey if he's up for it. Encourage interaction to help him through his depression. If he is leukemia negative, consider adopting a playmate for him in a month or two, when his depression has begun to lift, if this is something your heart has room for. If he's leukemia positive, there are always leukemia positive cats in need of a good home, but I understand this undertaking is not for everyone.

As for how you should deal with the loss, take your time, and do what feels right. I often make scrapbooks to my pets' memories to help cope with my grief. I've planted gardens, had plaques made, made donations in memory of them, and like many people, even got a tattoo! I keep a cedar box with the belongings of each pet I have lost, along with special pictures, and this helps me to keep them in my life in a way. I hope you are able to find a way to keep Mr. Kitty's memory alive.

Best wishes,
Jessica