Paloma

Question
I have a 2 1/2 year old Peruvian cross palomino mare, who I bought a couple of months ago to save from going to a feedlot. She has not been worked with at all. She was very underweight but is now very healthy already. The first time she saw me she came up right away and I could pet her, she is a very friendly horse. I have manage to get the halter on her a few time with no hassle just by petting her and scratching her with it and then she would let me slip it on. I would take it off right away so that she knows it not a trap and its safe and all that. She was being boarded at this place though where the guy has a very different perspective on horse training and I think he messed with her because now when I try to approach her she completely avoids me and I haven't been able to even touch her in weeks. She is at a new place now and it is a much better place but I don't know how I can gain her trust back when I can't even get near her. And I didn't do anything to make her like this, so its very frustrating, why doesn't she trust me because of something someone else did? Its just not fair!! She is getting older and I don't want to give up on her because not many people are gonna want a horse that old that isn't broke. She is smart and beautiful and has awesome movement, she never kicks or bites, she's a pure sweet heart but her trustful nature has been taken from her. What should I be doing?? She has never had treats and wont take them she looks at an apple like she doesn't know what to do with it, so bribing isn't even an option....I have spent time just sitting in the field waiting for her to notice and she has gotten close enough to smell me but not for me to touch her.....I don't know if I should just keep doing that.....I live in Alberta and its pretty cold outside......but whatever it takes......she is in with another mare who is the lead but is old and doesn't have any desire to be worked with, Paloma just hides behind her all the time....should I separate them or use the other mare to my advantage in some way??

Answer
Kate,

I would suggest some round pen work.  If not familiar with it get some of the videos that are available.  I especially like Pat Parelli.  If you don't have a round pen you can improvise with a small paddock and boards across the corners.  She's been lied to and isn't willing to trust any human right now.  The round pen work will let you re-connect with her without having her on a lead or anything.  As far as the halter, when I first put one on I just leave it on so the horse gets used to it.  Make sure it's a safety halter with a break-away feature so that she can't get hung up in it and hurt herself.  You will need to put some intensive work and time in for a while to get her turned around.  

You have a mare and they don't take kindly to being forced.  Just like you they like to be asked to do something, not forced.  Unfortunately, there are a lot of unconverted people, especially men, who simply have control issues.  I love mares, don't like to ride geldings especially.  By taking her into a round pen you will give her the opportunity to move away but she can never really get away.  Horses sometimes take a while to get and idea/concept through their heads, they can be sort of slow learners.  Especially horses with issues which is what you have.  They need to think things through and the round pen work gets them to do that.  They start thinking rather than just instinctively reacting.  I also would not keep her in a big field for a while, rather a paddock by herself so that she has to interact with you whenever you come.  As far as treats go, yeah, she hasn't the faintest idea what they are yet.  This will change once you break through the wall she's erected here for protection.  The first treats would probably best be the kind that are made specifically for horses and are molasses and grains so it's something she'll recognize as food.  She would also benefit from watching you feed it to another horse so she can learn by example.  You'll make huge strides once she'll take bribes.  You can buy a lot of good responses with bribes believe me.  But I do make the horses earn their rewards, they just don't get them.  If they get greedy, pushy or otherwise ill mannered about them they get a good scolding and no treats.  I just won't accept that kind of behavior.  You can walk out into my herd of 7 horses and ponies and they will all come up looking for treats but there is rarely a display of bad manners.  No pushing, shoving, making of ugly faces at one another.  You get the idea.  Any of that and I turn into their worst nightmare, yelling and smacking the offender and chasing him/her away from the rest.  They all move but come right back as soon as I have run the offender off because they did nothing wrong.  They all recognize that I am the "lead mare" even out in the field.  

You've got what sounds like a lovely horse here and I think you have what it takes to love her and turn her around.  She's got the potential of becoming your best friend.  Patience is the key here.  Forget about being frustrated and angry, etc. about what has happened.  That's over and done so all you can do is go from here.  You can't let that get in the way of your work now.  

Let me know how you progress with her, please.

Lyn