how do we train?

Question
We have recently purchased an African grey parrot,)about two months ago) and we were informed that he is not hand reared. He's about two years old and is NOT very tame at all. When we first got him, he would scream and get very upset even if you approached him. Within a few weeks he improved quickly, letting us feed him peanuts directly into his mouth. The cage we had was way too small so we got him a lovely new one, really big with an open top. He's got lots of lovely toys and is in our living room where he gets lots of attention.
Problem is, recently he has started to bite us. (us meaning, my girlfriend and i). He doesn't bite all the time, just some times. I feel he's not biting for attention, but to make us go away. We cannot touch him anywhere other than his beak (this risks a bite to). He will not climb on us at all, and as his bites draw blood, we dont feel safe trying to get him to step on our hands any more. We than decided to try stick training, starting with trying to get him to step onto a perach held by us to get a peanut. This has now made him afraid of sticks, he hates the site of a stick held by anyone. We have been very patient with arnie, always allowing him to approach us with taming, but we seem to have come to a stand still, and even started to reverse with this biting. We are both careful to give him no reaction to biting. Even if it hurts like hell, we will not react at all. (untill we are out of site and earshot, then the language is foul!)please advise us about what to do next. We are worried that his behavior will never change because he is not a baby bird and that every day of not training him is doing more damage.
thank you

Answer
First, give your grey time. He is a young adult bird who has never been handled... it will take MONTHS for him to begin to trust you and your girlfriend.

Also, remember that birds do not always like to be pet. Some birds will never except petting (no matter how tame they might seem).  Greys are not cuddly birds and many will never allow petting (other than the occational head scratch).  Please also keep in mind that it requires a lot more trust for a bird to allow you to pet him/her than it does for the bird to step up onto a hand or perch.  In the wild, if a bird was going to get caught by a predator... it would be from behind (on their back, behind their head, etc...). So it takes a great deal of trust for a bird to allow you to put you hand on his back or behind his head.

Here are some articles/books that I think you will find useful:

http://www.quakerparrots.com/qtips/winning_trust_of_abused_bird.htm (not that your bird was abused... but the methods for earning a birds trust don't change... whether the bird was abused or just never handled before).

http://www.companionparrot.com/articles/tribute.html

http://www.companionparrot.com/beakbook.html

http://www.companionparrot.com/articles/myths.html

http://www.companionparrot.com/articles/punish.html

I hope this helps.

-Maggie