Need help with my Cocker Spaniel Rescue

Question
Three weeks ago, we adopted a 4 year old female cocker spaniel from the city shelter. She is still intact and awaiting her spay in 2 weeks. She was bred frequently and has such horribly hanging nipples. They will be surgically corrected at the time of spay because they really seem to bother her. She also came with ear infections, redness on her paws and no hair at all around her sad little eyes. She has been to the vet twice and we are working on all of these problems with meds and holistic foods.  She is housetrained... most of the time. The real issue with Possum seems to be that she is SUPER AFRAID of even the slightest noise or most calm visitor. She gets so upset when the dog walker comes that she began having accidents in the house... this is counterproductive to say the least.  I feed her 2xs a day and keep fresh water out at all times. However, just as I am writing this she ate the cats' food... I can't turn my head for a second!  She also has no interest in toys or playing - she just stays at my side whenever she can. Unless she sneaks away for a moment to get into the cat food...lol. I just need ANY advice you can give me on socialization - should I force some outings or take it at her pace? She is even afraid of her walk at night and pulls to go back in the house...leading to housetraining problems. I am committed to this dog and will do whatever is necessary to bring her peace in our family.

Thanks,
Tara, David, Possum,
Puppy & Penguina (the cats)

PS - so sorry I was rambling... there is just so much I don't know!

Answer
Hi Tara,
First of all...thanks for adopting from a shelter and I can't tell you how nice it is to hear the words "I'm committed".

There are two issues here.  I need to know what food she's on and what meds.  I do have suggestions for supplements that will help the skin/ear issues.

Now..the fearfulness and piddling.  You have to ignore the piddling.  Do not reprimand. It's involuntary and she can't help it.  As far as walks go...yes, you need to force it "a little".  I'd like you to try something often used in training.  Put her leash on her in the house and fix it to your belt loop (or wherever) and for half an hour she goes where you go.  Then try going outside (without comment).
Don't go anywhere...just out the door for about 10 ft. and then back in.  No conversation - no comforting or persuasion - just go and come right back.

I'd like to know her reaction to that.

Also..this dog has been through a lot and you've only had her 3 weeks.  She's obviously bonded to you and now you need to built up some trust.  How is she with the rest of your family?
Delores