Male/female matter for new cat?

Question
I have a 2 1/2 yr old male who is very affectionate but can sometimes have a bit of an attitude %26 can sometimes be a bit nervous. He is neutered %26 is generally well behaved.

I have lately been considering getting another kitten so that he can have some company while I am at work %26 my daughter is at school.  After reading through some of the other questions on this site I do realize that it may be awhile before it would be appropriate to leave them unseparated while we're gone.

My main question is would the sex of the new kitten we choose possibly make a difference in the likelihood of the two cats getting along?  Also, at what age would it be okay to leave the new cat loose when I am not home?

Thank you!
Erin

Answer

dog crate Erin,

The most important thing about introductions is to go SLOWLY! Do not try to rush it or force them together or you WILL end up with behavior problems. I am including some excellent links to articles on how to do the introductions properly. They should be helpful as a guide.
(copy and paste, or type the whole links into your address bar)

http://www.messybeast.com/first-impressions.htm

http://www.littlebigcat.com/index.php?action=library&act=show&item=cattocatintro...

Most cats do not like kittens until they have grown up. Older cats usually do not care for kittens because of their energy level, smell, and the fact that they ruin an older cat's routine and peace. A kitten, if it is healthy, will have lots of energy and will like to play a lot. When the only other playmate for the kitten is an older cat he will try to play with her as she would another with another kitten. That causes problems. For the older cat...and for the kitten, who gets confused and can get depressed and can lose heart because the older cat won't play and will growl at her. As the kitten grows and gets more secure and self-confident he may intesify his annoying behavior towards your older cat out of boredom or to expend energy. That may cause the older cat to become stressed or cause behavior problems (like inappropriate elimination) or it can cause the older cat to be aggressive towards the younger cat out of frustration.

When you get a kitten for an older cat you should get 2 kittens, or the new friend for a resident cat should be one close in age and temperament (gender doesn't matter, it's the cat's personality, experiences, and energy level that does). When you have 2 kittens they play together with rough-house kitty play, chase each other, and play normal kitty games, and then snuggle together for comfort and companionship. They tend to leave the older cat alone more. That relieves the older cat if he is not interested in playing, but leaves the option open if he does.

Growling, slaps, and hisses are nothing to worry about. They are just "kitty communication". That is the way the older cat tells the younger cat to keep it's distance, what the rules of "his house" are, etc. When to be concerned is if there are ears pinned back, blood being shed, or major fur flying.

Once the cats can be together without being aggressive, or freaking out, feed the cats yummy cat treats periodically (like tuna, sardines (in oil) or pieces of raw steak, etc.) TOGETHER. That is so the cats will associate each other with something pleasant. Also getting a pet laser light (at PetSmart, Petco, etc.) is great for interaction between the cats. They can chase the 'little red bug' on the floor, ceilings, and walls, and they tend to forget about the other cat as they focus on the 'bug' which helps them get used to each other.

For a new cat or kitten I use a large dog carrier or dog crate that I got at Petco. One that can hold a litterbox and food and water dishes that you can hook to the wires of the carrier or crate, with sleeping room. That way the cats can get used to each other safely and you can let them out to be together for short periods of time. And you can switch and put your older cat in the carrier or crate and let the kitten(s) out to explore safely. The are good because a new cat or kitten(s) isn't locked in a room alone by itself and can get used to voices, sounds, and smells of the household. Plus it is safe when you aren't home.

With patience, time, and love...and doing the introduction process correctly, things should work out. That is a nice gesture to get a friend for your cat. Some cats are solitary and don't like other cats around, but most like to have a playmate, someone to cuddle with, and someone to comfort them and keep them company when they are alone or bored. Just make sure that you give your older cat a lot of love and attention, (and kitty treats) so he doesn't feel like you like the other cat better than him now.

Tabbi