Older cat vs. roomate!

Question
Hello,
I have a 17 year old female cat.  I recently got a new roomate that she HATES!!!  She won't let him near her without getting freaked out.  I recently went out of town for a week and when I returned she was very stressed and lost weight, though her appetite and deification were normal.  She's only okay with him if I'm around and he keeps his distance.  I am planning a 3 week vacation next month and very worried about leaving her, especially considering her age.  She has developed severe separation anxiety and won't leave my side.  I'm afraid the stress of being gone  and her fear of my roomate might be fatal.  Any suggestions on how I can get her to overcome her fear of my roomate?  He's tried so hard to get her to accept him, but without any luck.

Thank you and best regards,
Nancy

Answer
HI Nancy,

Has there ever been any issue's with males previously in her life?  Unfortunately a cat her age may be going a bit senile and there may also be absolutely no reason for her dislike of your new roommate.  The biggest recommendation here is for him to stop trying, let her go to him on HER terms.  He is not you, and I would gather that you and her have been together on your own for quite a while?  Being new he is invading her territory.  I would have him completely ignore her, while you are away he can feed and clean the litter boxes but do not try to play, pet or cuddle and I would bet within about a week she will be curled up on his lap.  There is also a chance at her age that she will never come around, but if he leaves her alone she will tolerate his presence.  

Another thing you can try is the felliway diffusers, these fill the environment with a 'happy' pheromone, this pheremone is the one that a cat naturally secrets through glands on their whisker pads.  I am sure you have seen her rub her face against you, she is marking you as 'friendly' with her own sent.  Your friend can try spraying a bit on himself and the diffuser will help to calm her down overall.

I would recommend trying to take her with you but at her age this would likely be more stressful than leaving her with the new roommate.  

Hope this helps.

Natoma