New cat- very violent!

Question
Tabbi,

A close friend of mine recently had to move and could not take his normally very mellow cat with him (2 years old male,fixed, no health problems as of very recent vet visit), and see if it could work out with my household (includes a 3 year old spayed female). I did some reading on how to introduce cats and such, but the problem is my friend's cat Snitch has become so violent I can barely deal with him.
We put him in two rooms seperate from the rest of the house, and have not let the two cats interact yet, and we have tried to slowly introduce snitch into the household. Currently he's been here a week and is at the moment so violent when I get near him that I cannot put on his new tag with my phone number, nor even herd him into his two rooms after he's been let into the rest of the house (I can't keep the other cats locked up in a bathroom for ever to let him explore). Now it's becoming a contest of wills - which isn't what I want to happen, between me and the cat (and I don't want him to hate me either but there comes a limit for me). What can I do? There isn't anywhere else for Snitch to go but a shelter and I really REALLY do not want to take that route (I was the last option as a home to begin with).

Answer
Worn Out:

You have a very unhappy kitty on your hands that is reacting the only way he knows how.

He is more than likely going through separation anxiety and grieving from missing his owner PLUS he has a new owner, a new home, new cats in the home, he has lost 'his' territory, nothing is familiar, his routine has changed and he is really stressing.

I think I would too! One of my suggestions would be to go to the vet and get some 'kitty prozac' (or something similar) to help him through this adjustment period. A vet can prescribe it for short term, usually about 2 weeks. It will relax him and help him deal with things more calmly.

You are probably the only familiar thing to him (I don't know the situation so I am assuming) and he is more than likely blaming YOU for this stressful situation he is in.

Don't take it real personal. He is just reacting. Leave him be for a while. A week is not very long. Don't expect miracles. It may take him a month or more to relax some. And he will probably strike out at any person or animal that comes near him. He is grieving and needs time to come to terms with that. He is stressed and confused and probably looking for his 'daddy'. If he gets outside at this point he probably will take off and go 'look' for him or try to go home.

Put him in a quiet place/area/room with his food and litterbox. Leave him there for maybe a week. When you go into the room talk before you go in. At first go in there and 'do' something and ignore him. See if he gradually warms up a little when he sees that you are not going to be harrassing (to him) him. Next bring him some special food/treat. He may not want to eat though.

Sit on the floor away from him and offer the treat/food. Don't try to give it to him, that won't work. And NEVER make eye contact with him! That is considered a VERY threatening gesture. If you do look at him SLOWLY blink your eyes, or look at him and look away. Either hold out your hand/dish or set it down near you but not TOO close. He has to make the gesture and come to you. Food is a great bribe!

If he comes to eat whatever it is, don't try to pet him or make any moves towards him. Just talk to him quietly and gently the whole time. The point is for him to relax and trust you.

Do that for a couple of days. Feed him and talk to him. If he gets where he is making contact with you then gently stroke him and talk nonsense to him. If he won't come close enough, but he is not growling or hissing anymore, then get a dangle fishing type toy and see if he will play. That will build up his confidence and help him forget things. Plus it helps build a bond with you. Just don't rush anything.

Don't let him out of the room and DON'T try to socialize him with your other cats yet. He has a lot to adjust to so take it slowly. It's a pain I know, but it will be worth it.

Your cats will probably come to the other side of the door and they can sniff each other. A helpful way to bring them together is get a sock or a soft rag and rub it all over your regular cats then rub him with their scent. And vice-versa. This will help when they meet to have familiar scents.

If he is relaxing a bit then a good way to safely acclimate him to the household is put him in a pet carrier with a towel to hide under and bring him out. Put the carrier in a central location where the regular noises and activities are. Let him get used to the voices of the household and the everyday noises and movements. He can hide or he can watch. The other cats may come to check him out. Let them do it for short periods of time at first.

Turning him loose to explore is too overwhelming. Too much new. When you think he is ready, take him into another room to scout around. Gradually widen his area a room at a time every couple of days. Still keep your cats away while he is learning all about his new home. Still do the scent thing though.

Then have him meet one cat at a time so he doesn't feel bullied or threatened. Just stand away and let them get aquainted. There will be hisses, growls, and slaps but that is normal kitty communication. As long as no ones ears are pinned flat back, no blood is being shed, and no major fur is flying it is OK.

Interchange who he meets until he is familiar with both. Remember he was the boss of his territory before and now he is going into other cats territories and he doesn't have any territory. It will depend on the cat's personalities all around on how it will work out.

Be sure to play with your regular cats and give them lots of love and attention (and kitty treats) so they know they are not being replaced in your affections.

Then try to do the interactive play with all the cats. That is the best way for them to intermingle, besides feeding them together.

I hope I have given you some ideas on how to approach this and how he feels. It is going to take PATIENCE, TIME, and LOVE.

Please keep me posted on how he is doing and how YOU are doing. It's not going to be easy but it WILL work out. If the cat was mellow before, then he should get that way again....eventually!

Tabbi