Pet Information > ASK Experts > Dogs > Canine Behavior > Why does he stare me all the time?

Why does he stare me all the time?

18 16:33:41

Question
I'm not very close with our "family dog." I used to play with him, pet him, and pay attention to him all the time but once when playing with him he growled and scratched my cheek, breaking the skin (it didn't leave a scar, thank god). Ever since then, I don't play with him - I only throw one of his toys when he's extremely persistent in getting me to play. It's become a habit to just ignore (to the point of when I honestly forget he's there.) I rarely ever pet him, unless he comes to the backdoor to "greet me" when I come home.

Everybody in the house feeds him table food, except for me and my step-brother. Although he gives him some on rare occasions, I don't give him any on any circumstances. So he never comes to me when I have food. He doesn't even stare.

Ever since I started ignoring him, the dog continues to stare at me when I'm in the vicinity. Whenever I catch him staring at me, I normally stare back until he looks away. Most of the time he looks away, and then continues to stare back at me minutes later. Whenever I go into the kitchen he follows me, but never comes into the kitchen with me (but he does with other family members) and just stares. At these times I stare back at him and shoo him away, he always scurries, looks back, then goes lay down in a different room. He never stares at anyone this much except for me. It doesn't bother me, I'm curious as to what the behavior means....so why does he stare at ME all the time?

Answer
By ignoring this dog and refusing interaction with him when he demands it (while others in the family are busy promoting him psychologically, it appears), you are making a very strong statement of "rank".  Unavailability is a strong signal to any dog that you are MUCH higher "ranking", i.e., psychologically untouchable.  Dogs watch EVERYONE all the time, although it can appear that they are not doing so.  Dogs communicate with one another WITH BODY LANGUAGE, so observing humans in their environment is VERY important to a dog.  This dog is giving you calming signals that you are not responding to appropriately (how do I know this? because any dog WILL give such signals when a conspecific -- even a created one, such as are humans, "communicates" in a way the dog understands).  You're not aware of his signals, so he is becoming confused and is beginning to mistrust you.  Staring at him until he looks away is also making a strong statement of "dominance".  The dog doesn't trust you, he doesn't know how to please you, he can't determine what to make of this situation.  Many dogs "growl" and use their paws during play, this does not indicate aggressive intention.  You can continue to ignore the dog if you wish, but it isn't teaching him a thing.  Remind yourself of this situation when you're out on your own; I don't think you're a candidate for dog ownership.