Trying to blend families

Question
QUESTION: Me and my 4 1/2 year old male cat recently moved in with my boyfriend and his 7 yr old female and 5 year old male.  First a little history on his 2.  When the 5v year old came he was just weeks old and found in a puddle.  The than 2 year old female would terrorize himn so badly he lived under the hutch until he could no longer fit and was big enough to fight back. Fast forward to now, they still fight with each other but it is just an occasional slap in the face and sometimes more.  When we decided to move in I brought my male over and much to our suprise both kitties are ganging up on my kitty.  He is often forced to stay in one spot and when he does decide to get down he has to wait until the coast is clear.  Sometimes he doesn't realize another kitty is there and runs into a fight.  For whatever reason he doesn't fight back.  After about 3-4 weeks of being here he pooped on the floor several times.  Now i found urine on ther kitchen counter. I don't want to give him away but i just don't know what to do.  Please help me.


dog crate   ANSWER: Gina,

You should not ever just bring a cat into a home with other cats and turn them loose and expect the resident cats to welcome him with "open paws". You need to go through a period of slowly getting them acquainted. The process may take 2 weeks to a month or more. You can end up with serious behavior problems (such as you are seeing with his cats) if you don't.

You are bringing a new cat into an established territory. You need to do the introduction process from the beginning like they are new cats. It may take longer since there have been bad feelings already.

I am attaching a couple of links on how to go about the introduction process: (copy and paste, or type the whole links into your address bar)

http://www.messybeast.com/first-impressions.htm

http://www.littlebigcat.com/index.php?action=library&act=show&item=cattocatintro

You can get what is called Feliway (or Comfort Zone with Feliway). It is a spray and you can get plug-ins (try PetSmart, a vet (they use it too), or on-line). It is very popular and is great for calming cats and reducing stress. It copies the relaxing pheromones that cats produce from rubbing their faces on things.

There is also a calming product that you can add to their food or water that reduces anxiety called Bach's Rescue Remedy. It is available on-line and in health food stores. Here is a link about it: (copy and paste, or type the whole links into your address bar)
http://www.bachflower.com/Pets.htm

Once they can be together without fighting feed both cats yummy cat treats (like tuna or pieces of raw steak) TOGETHER. That is so the cats will associate each other with something pleasant.

Also getting a pet laser light (at PetSmart, etc.) is great for interaction between the two cats. They both can chase the 'little red bug' on the floor, ceilings, and walls, and they tend to forget about the other cat as they focus on the 'bug' which helps them get used to each other.

I use a big dog crate for a new cat introduction. It has room for litterbox, food and water, small cat carrier without the door for a bed and to get up on, and they still have room. That way they can get used to other cats around, and other cats can sniff and check them out safely. You can gradually let the cat out for short periods of time as they start getting used to each other. I got mine at Petco. I am attaching a picture of it.

It just takes time and lots of patience.


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks for the advice.  We did leave mine his regular crate for a little while but I guess it wasn't long enough.  Since I haven't actually given up my apartment yet, do you think it wouldbe beneficial for me and my cat to go home for a few days and than reintroduce them the correct way?

Answer
Gina,

That might be a good idea so the cat can unwind and relax somewhere familiar before you attempt it again. There are times when it won't work, but they are rare. With a lot of love and affection to your cat so he doens't think he is being replaced, and a lot of time and patience, it should work out ok. Just make sure he has a place he can go where go to feel safe and that has a litterbox for him if he is scared to use the communal one (but that is probably just stress right now).

Tabbi